Let Me Tell You Something Page 5
For all of the ups and downs of a large family, I wouldn’t trade it for the world. To be fifty-one and have all ten siblings and both parents alive and healthy, all talking to each other and with a deep bond between us, makes me the luckiest person on earth. Just don’t ask my siblings—you’ll get a completely different story!
Never compare the kids
One lesson I took from growing up with so many siblings that I have applied to my own parenting is to never compare my kids to each other. The worst thing I ever heard when I was little was, Why can’t you be more like your sister? It’s a horrible thing to say to a kid who’s trying to establish her own identity.
There’s no such thing as
a perfect Christmas.
Every year when Christmas rolls around the madness begins, crap, I have so much to do, I have to fight the crowds, I have to buy the food, I have to buy the presents, I have to wrap the presents, I have to decorate the house. But I see all of this as part of the fun and find ways to make every aspect of the holidays enjoyable. I wouldn’t trade the insanity for the world (then again, maybe I’m a little crazy). My love for that one holiday blinds me to the stress of it. I think of Christmas the way I think of childbirth—it’s insanely stressful and painful, but the minute the hard part is over, you forget it immediately and it was all worth it.
I fall for the Christmas stress trap every year in a big, bad way. It’s stress piled on top of anxiety and pressure, and I’m just as guilty as the next person of leaving things to the last minute and rushing back and forth to the mall, supermarket, and Internet. The work is always the same and it’s always a lot, but it’s my frame of mind that gets me through it. I know the happiness this will bring to my children and that Christmas only happens one day a year. For me it’s worth it. It’s chaos and it drives me absolutely crazy, but through it all, I know one thing: my table will be set beautifully, there’ll be a gorgeous centerpiece on it, and at the end of it all, there’ll be a wonderful gathering of my family and friends.
BEHIND THE SCENES
When we agreed to let the cameras film our Christmas for season three, it just didn’t occur to me that we’d be forcing our crews to miss their own Christmas as a result. I felt horrible when I realized the crew would be spending Christmas at my house, not with their own families. So what you didn’t see is that we set a complete second table in the dining room for the crew so they got to sit and have Christmas dinner with us. Lauren and I also went and got every crew person a personalized gift, and we gave each of them a gift bag with my homemade hot chocolate mix, a mug, and some hats, socks, and gloves, because they freeze when we film in the winter.
Sure, there’ll be drama, there’ll be stuff going wrong, but let me tell you this: Christmas is still my favorite holiday. Hands down.
We have a pregame on Christmas eve. If there’s fifty people coming here on Christmas Day, we do everything the night before Christmas eve. So on the night of the twenty-third, we drop everything and get into the kitchen and do all the baking. It’s one of my favorite nights of the year. I don’t want to bake a week before and freeze it; I like to do it on the twenty-third. And every year, all my sisters, all my sisters-in-law and nieces, they all come here and we cook. My mom comes too.
The guys hang out, playing video games and shooting the shit, and all the girls are in the kitchen, baking. Every now and then a guy will wander in and help chop and they’ll stay and laugh. We’re up until three o’clock in the morning, and it doesn’t feel like a chore at all. It feels like family.
On the twenty-fourth I’m tired and there’s so much to do. I have to set the entire table and get the whole house ready. The phone never stops ringing, this person isn’t coming, that person is having some other drama, this other person is on a diet and wants diet food. I just listen, make mental notes, and keep on getting the house ready.
There’s no such thing as a perfect Christmas. Someone’s late, someone’s not gonna come, someone’s drunk. Something always happens, and that’s just part of it. No point in getting cranky about it or letting it get to me. On Christmas Day, if someone wants to be an asshole, they can be an asshole. If people want to fight, that’s fine, they can fight as long as they let me eat. You need to accept that a perfect Christmas will most likely involve some sort of drama. Instead of letting it “spoil the day,” just roll with it.
We had a Christmas a few years ago that was definitely one of the worst. My mother decided she was going to leave my father, right before Christmas. Did I mention that she was seventy-one years of age? She decided she wanted to change her life up a bit. She came to stay at my house, so my father didn’t come to Christmas that year. That was not a good year. And thankfully she changed her mind.
This past Christmas was the opposite. I had a house full of people, laughing and loving. We had complete chaos, of course, there weren’t enough chairs, Lauren was yelling at Albie and Chris to get more chairs, people were sitting all over the place. The table barely got set, kids were running around, adults were falling asleep, the house was completely trashed, but I was perfectly, serenely happy. That’s Christmas to me.
If Christmas truly feels like a chore to you, rein it in a little bit. Make it less of a production, but keep it personal. It’s not about the money you spend, it’s about the time you spend. Whether you nearly kill yourself like I do, or you take it easy and have a lovely low-key day with your family, what matters most is that your family is together, happy, and healthy. Nothing can beat that.
How to set the perfect table, Caroline-style
I love to set a table, but there’s nothing more boring than a perfectly matched and set table. Setting a table should be about you and your personality and the holiday at hand. It’s something to have fun with, not something to try to get perfect.
1. Start with your tablecloth and napkins. Nice linen sets are perfect for most table settings, but if you’re doing BBQ, go ahead and use a plastic one for an informal yet still themed setting.
2. I love holiday table decorating. For Easter, it’s all potted plants and ceramic rabbits and pastel dinnerware. For Christmas, it’s a garland and candles and poinsettias, and lots of reds and greens and golds. Most days, if you stopped by my place for a meal, you’d get paper napkins and maybe even plastic cups. I don’t go crazy every day . . .
3. A beautiful table has a cloth and a runner, but they don’t have to be a matching set, and I also don’t care if the dinnerware matches. Sometimes I’ll mix and match for the same themed meal. I like to make it fun. I like using napkin rings, but sometimes I’ll tie a ribbon bow around the linen napkin instead.
4. I like to set out three glasses—wine, water, and goblet, but it depends on what you’re serving. I also mix and match the glasses. You want people to see the table and think of your taste, your style, not that you went and bought a whole packaged deal at a store.
Christmas traditions evolve;
embrace the changes.
My love of Christmas began when I was a kid. Christmases were always unbelievable. My father’s plastics company provided plastic to the major toy makers, Ideal, Mattel, you name it. So come Christmas, we’d get a massive truckload of toys delivered from the toy companies! More toys than we could even dream of playing with.
As I transitioned to being a parent myself, I wanted Christmas to be just as special. I have always remembered and cherished the feeling of how special my parents made Christmas for me and my siblings, and that is what I’ve brought in my role as mother to my own children.
The number of people in the house doesn’t matter, the number of presents under the tree doesn’t matter either. As long as you’ve got a house full of love and laughter, your Christmas will be perfect.
Being from a big family means that there’s always a lot of juggling when it comes to the holidays. Today things have changed, but all eleven of my siblings are a part of each other’s holiday celebrations, and we include our parents, and we also have our own kids. As you can im
agine, it can get hectic. In recent years, Jacqueline and I have started trading off and hosting most of the holidays. I’ll do Christmas, she’ll do Thanksgiving. One of us will take Easter and one of us will take a big birthday. My brother Chris is as fond of the family traditions as I am, so that’s why we share.
At this point in my life the hosting traditions are shifting. The younger generation wants to do the cooking, and soon they’ll want to start hosting. Lauren and my nieces are already taking over in the kitchen, and they’re learning the family recipes. Teaching my daughter and nieces the secrets to recipes I learned from my mother has been incredibly touching. I actually can’t wait until the first one of them asks to host Christmas, I don’t even care if it’s Lauren or one of my nieces. I know I’m just going to be so proud.
Since I started on the show, I’ve been so busy in the lead-up to Christmas that I just haven’t had enough time to do everything. Rather than let traditions lapse, my kids have all stepped up to make sure that they continue.
RECIPES
Nutella Pizza
1 lb. pizza dough (you can make your own, but you can cut the prep time in half by buying fresh pizza dough from the refrigerator section of your local supermarket or pizzeria)
¼ cup flour for prepping the dough
¼ cup melted butter
1 jar chocolate-hazelnut spread, I prefer the Nutella brand. You don’t have to use the entire jar, but it’s good to spread it on thick.
2 cups fresh fruit of choice—I generally use sliced bananas, sliced strawberries, halved raspberries, and blueberries
1 sprig fresh mint, to taste, for garnish (optional)
Confectioners’ sugar, for garnish
Raspberry sauce, to taste (optional, you can purchase raspberry sauce at your local supermarket or see my recipe below)
Heat oven to 450°F.
Line a heavy large baking sheet with parchment paper. Lightly dust the pizza dough with the flour and roll out onto the prepared baking sheet. Make little indentations in the dough by working it with your fingers. Brush the dough with the melted butter, then bake until the crust is a light golden brown, about 20 minutes.
Remove the pizza from the oven and spread desired amount of hazelnut spread onto crust. Don’t go crazy, a nice even layer is enough, you don’t want it too thick!
Slice the bananas and strawberries and spread them evenly over pie. Add other berries as desired.
You can add a couple of sprigs of fresh mint if you’d like, if not, no big deal.
To finish it off you can either sprinkle a little confectioners’ sugar on top or drizzle a fruit glaze. My favorite is raspberry; again, don’t go crazy, just a light drizzle.
Fruit Glaze
Below is an easy recipe for a raspberry glaze, but if you’re not in the mood to make it from scratch, you can find tons of different glazes in your local market.
2 cups raspberries, fresh or frozen
2 Tbsp. fresh lemon juice
6 Tbsp. sugar
Puree the berries in a blender with the lemon juice. Slowly add the sugar until blended. Strain through a fine strainer, pressing with a rubber spatula to release the juices and eliminate seeds.
Spaghetti Aglio e Olio
This is my boys’ favorite dish. It’s so simple, but it’s really delicious. You can feed a family of five for under ten dollars!
1 lb. spaghettini or angel hair pasta, cooked and drained
½ cup olive oil
4–5 large cloves garlic, smashed, not chopped
¼ cup minced parsley
3 Tbsp. chicken stock
½ cup grated Locatelli Pecorino-Romano cheese (or fresh Parmesan)
Hot pepper flakes to taste
Cook the pasta according to the directions on the package. Drain.
Heat the oil in a skillet, over medium heat. Add the garlic and sauté gently until it starts to brown. Remove the skillet from the heat immediately.
Pour the olive oil and garlic over the pasta. Add the parsley and chicken stock. Toss and serve immediately.
Top with the cheese and pepper flakes to taste.
SERVES 4.
Pork Chops, Potatoes, and Vinegar Peppers
Our traditional Sunday dinner always has a main course after the pasta. Here is a recipe for Christopher’s absolute favorite dish that I cook.
8 medium-size Yukon Gold potatoes, washed, peeled, and cubed
4–6 center-cut 1-inch-thick pork chops (on or off the bone)
1 cup milk
2 cups bread crumbs
1 cup flour
¼ cup canola oil
1 large onion, sliced
1 12-oz. jar of sliced red, green, and yellow vinegar peppers (I prefer Cento brand, but any brand will work.)
Salt and pepper to taste
Preheat the oven to 350°F.
Cook the potatoes in 4 to 6 cups of boiling water until tender, about ten minutes. Drain and set aside.
Rinse the pork chops and set aside. Prepare two medium bowls; fill one with the milk and the other with the flour and bread crumbs (mix well). Generously coat the pork chop in the milk and then place in the flour and bread crumb mixture. Set aside on a plate. Repeat with each chop until all pork chops are done.
Meanwhile, in a large skillet, heat the oil over medium heat. Add the sliced onions and cook for about three minutes. To the skillet, add the pork chops and cook for two minutes per side, or until both sides are golden brown. (You’re not cooking them through but just enough to brown them.) Remove the chops from the skillet to a plate. Do not toss away the juices from the pan, you will need them later.
In a large roasting pan, add the pork chops, potatoes, jar of peppers (liquid and all), and 4 to 5 tablespoons of the cooking juices from the skillet. Season with the salt and pepper to taste and mix well.
Cover your pan with aluminum foil and bake for ½ hour. Remove the foil from the pan and mix with a wooden spoon.
Raise the oven temperature to 375°F and cook for approximately 15 minutes longer.
SERVES 6.
Meatballs
Al says he married me for my meatballs. These are so good, and they’re really easy to make.
9 slices white bread, divided
1½ pounds meat loaf mixture (a combination of ground beef, pork, and veal; ask your butcher)
1 egg
A large handful Locatelli Pecorino-Romano grated cheese
6–8 large cloves of garlic, ground fine in a food processor
1 cup milk
Salt and pepper, to taste
Vegetable oil, for shallow frying
Pulse 6 slices of the white bread in a food processor to make homemade bread crumbs. In a large mixing bowl, combine the homemade bread crumbs with the meat, egg, cheese, garlic, milk, and salt and pepper, to taste in a large bowl.
Cut the crusts off remaining 3 slices of bread. Break the pieces up with your hands and combine with the meat mixture. The mixture should be very loose.
Using two soup spoons, form the meat into balls and fry the balls in the oil until they are brown, about five minutes.
SERVES 6.
Italian Garden Tomato Salad
Put those Jersey tomatoes to use! Here’s a simple quick recipe for an old-time family favorite.
5–6 large Jersey tomatoes (or fresh local farm stand tomatoes, the tastiest you can find!), cut into wedges
1 cucumber, sliced with skin on
1 green pepper, sliced
1 small red onion, thinly sliced
1 long hot pepper (optional), thinly sliced
Fresh basil, to taste
¼ cup extra virgin olive oil
Kosher salt and fresh ground pepper, to taste
Combine the tomatoes, cucumber, pepper, onion, and hot pepper in a salad bowl. Season with the fresh basil, extra virgin olive oil, kosher salt and fresh ground pepper to taste.
Nondiet watchers out there: make sure you have a nice loaf of Italian bread paired with this salad. Delicious!
Pasta e Fagioli
Albie can’t get enough of this dish. If he had his way, I’d make it every time he visited.
3–4 Tbsp. extra virgin olive oil
2 small celery ribs, chopped
4–5 garlic cloves, chunked
A handful of diced pancetta, optional
5–6 fresh plum tomatoes, diced (or 1 16-oz. can diced tomatoes)
1 can chicken broth
1 16-oz. can cannellini beans with liquid
2-inch rind from block of Pecorino-Romano or provolone cheese
1 box ditalini or small shells pasta, cooked and drained
Salt and pepper, to taste
Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese, to taste
Heat the olive oil in a pan over low to medium heat. Add the celery, garlic, and the optional pancetta. Sauté until the garlic browns a bit and the celery becomes transparent.
Add the diced tomatoes, stir and let simmer for about 15 minutes.
Add the chicken broth, cannellini beans with their water, and cheese rind, and let simmer on medium heat for about 25 minutes. (When cheese rind gets mushy, remove from the pot and set aside.)
Add the pasta, top with a drizzle of the olive oil, salt and pepper to taste and grated Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese—DONE!
SERVES 4.
Struffoli
This is an old family recipe that my grandmother used to make. We make it only on Christmas, and we usually fight over every last piece.
3 eggs
½ stick melted butter
Juice from ½ fresh orange
1 cup sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
3 cups flour
½ tsp. baking powder
2 cups Crisco
2 cups honey, or to taste
Candied sprinkles, to taste